if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
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