yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
