I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
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