this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
She even gives head with a lisp.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
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