she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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