he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
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