I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Randomize
