the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
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