Its about making memories worth repressing
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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