just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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