I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
