There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Randomize
