ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
Randomize
