that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Randomize
