But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
