you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
