question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Let's paint friendship bongs
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Randomize
