I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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