4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
he fucked my hip out of place.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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