He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
