honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
