well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
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