I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
