You can't special order awesome
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
