It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
