It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize