In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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