Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
