She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
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