you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
I would fuck him just for his dog
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
