y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Randomize
