nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
