i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Randomize
