i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
he just fucked me for my cheese.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
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