At least make sure they are 18
Why
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Randomize
