so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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