You work out of a Hotel?
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
