Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
