its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
