So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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