My entire life is one complicated drinking game
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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