hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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