8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
