He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
