We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Randomize
