How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
