Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
