I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize