I have demons in me.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
