I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
